Boo- hoo.

Movember
I hate coming back after such a long time without writing.
I've been ashamed and embarassed, I guess. So many friends told me it's completely unnecessary, but still, I was too proud to admit that finding a new job is a pain in the ass.
Since I left my most recent working place at the end of September, I've been wandering around the depths of internet and streets of Amsterdam, just to face the fact that getting a job will be as difficult as keeping a welcoming attitude at my previous job.
I've been asking everywhere, from Chipsy King to American Express. From souvenir shops to Zara or H&M. I was getting more negative answers than you could imagine. By the beginning of a sentence in an email I was already able to understand, that somewehere below I will find following words:
 'After taking a closer look at your CV, we regret to inform you, that you have not been chosen for further...' blah blah blah. My CV is so impressive that no one was able to hire me.
Something moved when I got into a very promising office, in a beautiful neighborhood and with a very clever manager, who somehow managed to make me believe, that I will make up to 2400euros per month. I was ment to get my own office in the future and travel the world.
Well.. nope. Thank God these days we have Google, and when I did a small research (well, not so small, I did it in 4 languages), it turned out that the company is a joke.
Next step was Mr. M, who owns 2 souvenir shops and calls himself a 'gentleman', while he managed to interview me for 5 hours, first at a local Burger King, then in his warehouse nr 1 and finally in the warehouse nr 2. Terrible evening. My mobile battery died, there was a storm outside and no public transport was running. Mattia was ready to report me missing at the police station, if I wouldn't be back in half an hour. Not to mention I was still receiving calls from Mr. M, even after I made it clear that I am NOT interested in going with him to China as his right hand, to control orders he made there for his shops. Right hand? I hope he was left handed.
I can't tell you how many times have I heard 'I will call you tomorrow/on Monday/next week' just to find out, that no one is going to call me back.
I was feeling guilty, telling my boyfriend every day 'still nothing'. Friends were sending messages to make sure I'm doing good. Well, I wasn't in the best mood.
And then, around beginning of November something moved. I suddenly got invited for 5 interviews.

Wednesday I am starting to work. I took a part time job at a restaurant which I always admired on my way to work, when I was still working for my previous employer.
Cute, friendly little place, with Italian dishes and biological mind. Owners are so lovely, that it's almost unbelievable. Just to add- the place is 5 minutes walking from my home.
 Well, we will see about that one.

Meanwhile, I am writing more for amsterdo.com. I feel that I am getting better. My most recent article had a huge number of views whch encourages me to write more. In fact I start to feel so confident about my writing, that I started a story. Once it will be finished, I am going to share it for sure. But just in case, I decide after next 20 pages that it sucks, I will print just one copy and burn it to the ground so nobody can read it.

Mattia is working hard. He is my hero. Last week I had the most amazing headache in my life. In addition to it I got a fever and my eyes were about to pop out. Mattia took a day off just to make sure that I will be fine. He cleaned the hosue, cooked and was so good to me. I'm blessed!

The days are getting short and grey. For an hour already I am sitting with a lamp switched on. My God, and it's still only 4pm. On the other hand it puts me in a creative mood. Yes, I get creative when it gets dark- either talking about weather or life events. Imagine that I am looking over a grey building, which has a tree in front, with last yellow leaves on it, fighting to keep their positions there.
The sky is smoke- grey and I hope it will start raining soon- as I don't need to go outside anymore today.
Penny is sleeping in her basket, Nancy is chilling in her cage. It's quiet. The water for the tea is ready, I will make myself a strong Earl Grey. It's time to move from writing to reading. You will find me on the sofa next to the window. I'll be half reading the fantastic events written down by Michail Bulhakov and half peeking outside, not able to stop tracing tree tops moved by the wind.

See you around (more often!)

xxx

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